Skeletons

when i sit here and cry
it's mainly from spinning all around
i'm afraid that when i fall
the person who is suppose to pick me up
will be falling over too
and i'll lie down on my back
and look up at the ceiling
that seems much too low
i'll remember all the things i did
to get here
repeating
repeating
repeating
the same mistakes and dead ends
over
and over
and over
i'll wonder what i'm lacking
or how i'm tricking myself
into believing this is the way it should be
i won't scream for her
that would turn my skin red
and i don't want to be red
rather be broken than red
i would lie there and die
before i would scream for her
which isn't surprising
because i've found that
while she is probably nursing her fall
she is refusing to scream for me
this is a stupid fucking paradox
and it ends with us both falling alone.